I am going to be the first to admit that I am not always the most optimistic member of my household. Sometimes I get feeling down about something and Jason the optimist will say "try to be positive", or "Life's great so act like it". Well these words feel more like scorning to me than encouraging and I get mad when he tells them to me. However, I have been trying lately to see the good side of things and during my spin class today I was trying extra hard to be grateful. As I thought about all the things in my life that I am eternally grateful for I started to smile and understand how Jason can look at a situation totally different than me with his optimistic eyes. Here are some examples.....
1st the weather here in Ol' Evanston, WY is still acting like WINTER.... It's the middle of May and it snowed just yesterday. I've been having a hard time loving it but this morning as I watched on the news about the drought in Texas I was so grateful to live here. They showed the animals dying of dehydration. My heart hurt for the people there that I'm sure have been praying continually for rain and here I am wishing that our moisture would just stop for a while. The reality is that I live in a great place that has been abundantly blessed this winter with lots of moisture.
2nd I have had a hard time being pregnant lately. Not because I don't want this child because I do more than anything but because I hate the way I feel about my growing self. I don't like to look in the mirror and sometimes I wish that I was a normal pregnant woman that just gained weight to show she's having a baby. However, nobody can even tell that I'm pregnant unless they know. Most people just look at me and the weight I've gained in my hips and other places that are totally not cool and think I've been eating a lot. At least that's how I feel. However, I've been trying to be grateful for my body and the abilities that I have been given because of it. I know that if I grew differently I might not have been able to run a half marathon and a 10k half way through my pregnancy. I also know that this is my body and I can't change it so I need to look at the amazing health that I have and be grateful to Heavenly father for it. Lastly, I know that some women are unable to have children and I am eternally grateful that I have been blessed with this gift to be able to have healthy babies.
For those of you who are still with me after all of my rambling I realize how blessed I am to have all of the things that I do and a few wonderful people that love me. This past weekend I was able to run a 10k as mentioned before with my amazing mother. Ever since I started running 4 years ago I've been trying to talk my mom into doing a race with me. She finally consented to running the half marathon with me in April but as training progressed she started having major hip problems which set her back. She still wanted to run a race so we found a 10k and she continued to work through her hip pain and train for this race. For those who don't know a 10k is 6.2miles. We ran the race together the whole way and my mom never stopped to walk once. We beat the goal time that we had set and my mom finished 4th in her age group. I was so proud of her!! I'm not sure how she feels about it but I know that when I run further than I've ever ran or set a goal and complete it I feel like I can do anything that I set my mind to. I was also proud of my dad who we saw 5 times during the race and each time he would run to my mom and give her encouragement and a high five. Of course my wonderful husband and beautiful daughter were there cheering us on to which always helps.
These are just a few things that are on my mind lately. Gratitude and optimism are some things that I know I will never be perfect at but I am trying.
